Laying in bed praying this morning, God showed me something about Himself that I’ve always been aware of but never really personally understood. He is Patience.
The last week or so, He’s been making me ready for something and I’ve felt His presence in a different way. Usually it’s His power that I feel. An overwhelming sense of His bigness. But not this time. This time its the feeling that there is a fresh movement, but that He’s not rushing around to make things happen. There is the sense of a nice breeze with the bustle of activity, but of easy going certainty that everything is moving along just nicely, at just the right clip.
Slow and steady wins the race.
No need to hurry, no need to rush, no need to be unsettled. Because it’s all under control. The pace is just right and everything is moving as it should for the purpose to be accomplished. This is the feeling I have of how He’s asking me to see my life. No need to be hurried or rushed. No need to feel unsettled. It’s all under control. The pace is just right and it’s all moving along just like it should for things to be what He’s promised they will be.
I had this same feeling when I was leaving South Texas a few weeks ago and coming home. The morning of the day I was due back, there was just a sense that there was no need to rush. That all that needed to be done was being done and that it would be just fine. I felt like Jehovah was saying to me that it was ok to just take my time and fully embrace the moment. The obedience and surrender and submission of the day was a big turning point and it needed to be approached with a certain level of care and respect. No rushing thru the beauty and the accepting. Life was changing and I needed to look it in the face and know that things would never be the same again. It was an opportunity to be one-on-one with God for the final time in that setting, giving over the last of my misgivings and what-not before coming back to face my life and begin the work of allowing Him to heal and restore both spiritually and naturally.
And now we’re here again. Remember my engraved invitation? He formally extended it a few weeks ago, but I had felt the tug in my spirit prior that He was preparing me to accept it when it came. So much so that when it came I wasn’t even surprised. But I was a bit leary. Because the stakes are high. Its different this time. It’s a pivotal point and it’s gonna require something of me if I choose to submit and walk it out.
Still. It’s too good an offer to pass up. So I didn’t. Pass it up, that is. I took it. And so this morning as I was laying in bed talking to the Lord about the weekend, sifting through my heart and really truly asking Him to do something new and open some doors, I had that same feeling again of the morning I left to come home. No need to rush through this process. I felt like He was asking me again to just embrace the time with Him and not worry about the length but to allow the work of the process to unfold in its own time.
The journey started last week but there was a shift today that takes it to a whole other level. This time around it really is a faith thing. It’s an opportunity to dig deeper and get closer in a new way. I’ve accepted this invitation many times before and in many various ways, so much so that it’s become pretty consistently my normal. But not this time. This time there are no fall-backs, no ways to make it easier, no avenues to still hedge my personal bets. It’s all on God. If He doesn’t provide for me on every every every level well. It just ain’t gonna happen. Usually that would make me panic. But today, there’s just no need to rush. No need to look forward to what comes next. Only to know that today is its own day and tomorrow will come when it comes.
As I realized that, as that moment of clarity rested on me, I understood what it is to be patient. It all makes sense. There is plenty to do and there are things that have to happen, but it’s all under control. No need to rush. Confidence and clarity should afford us the opportunity to simply sit back, relax, and watch God work. Do our parts and then let it be. This is what it is to ‘let patience have its perfect work’, this is what it is to be still and know that He Is God, so that in the end everything is complete and lacking in nothing.
God is never in a hurry because well, He doesn’t have to be. He knows the beginning and the end. He’s got it all in control and He’s sure of His workmanship. He has total confidence in the outcome, so He doesn’t have to try to hedge His bets or have a plan ‘b’. Plan A is the only plan that ever was; its the only one He’ll ever need. He can be patient because He knows it’s already done, just when and just how He intends.
Not only a lesson in patience, but also in faith. Accepting the invitation is a challenge to let my faith deepen, by allowing my spirit to be patient alongside Him and enjoy His company while I watch Him work in my life.
I’m not at all far into this thing, but already I know that I made the right choice. I’m nervous from the weekend because my heart, decietful thing that it is, feels like maybe I threw a monkey-wrench into the plan. But I didn’t. I did what was right; I did what God asked; I did my part. God knew it would be the way it turned out when He led me to do what I did. Its all part of His plan to bring everything full circle. I dont need a Plan B (cuz I sure have come up with one). I just need to know that Plan A is human-proof, because God is infalliable… I’ve doubted that all this time, but this morning He showed me in the briefest of seconds that there need be no doubt, just communion with Him. That’s it. Nothin’ else. Just enjoying the relationship we share and knowing that everything else will be exactly what it should be.
That’s monumental for a woman who never stops thinking, who’s never at rest internally but always looking for the next step to get to the next thing and the next place. Things are what they are, they ain’t what they ain’t, and they will be EXACTLY what they will be. No amount of hustle and bustle on my part is gonna change that, but accepting the offer to rest and watch, it’ll make all the differnce in the world.
I’ll take that, I will most definitely take that right now.
I didn’t go to church this morning, but I was definitely with my Jesus.
Thank you Lord for showing me something new. That thing You asked me to let go so that rest really can find me, You can have it. I trust You. No barriers, no fall-backs, no Plan B’s. You can have the Plan B; no matter Your decision on that thing, the only plan I’ll make it to keep on seeking You, keep on submitting to You, keep on living on Your terms and noone else’s. Forgive me for my worry. Please show Yourself in all the ways You care to over the days and weeks ahead. I love You and I will follow You forward. In Jesus’ Name. Amen.